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Being in a relationship takes work. As individuals, we are constantly growing and changing, which means that our relationships are also growing and changing. Many couples face a variety of challenges that can risk the stability of their relationship. However, couples counseling can help you identify and overcome such challenges. It’s important to note that couples counseling doesn’t mean a therapist “telling you what to do” to fix your relationship, but rather to facilitate a place of mutual growth where both parties better understand each other and improve your relationship.
Benefits Of Couples Counseling
It’s natural for couples to potentially feel that counseling is a “last ditch effort.” However, counseling can help a relationship at any stage. When you go to a therapist, you will find a compassionate, impartial third party who can see your relationship from an outside perspective. While it may be uncomfortable to discuss your private relationship and hardships with another person, there are many benefits to gain from counseling.
Early Warning Signs
It’s often a good idea for couples to seek counseling before moving in together or getting married, which can help identify any early warning signs of friction. It’s easy for us to get comfortable during the dating phase, but once lives merge in a very real way, it’s common for troubles to follow. Couples counseling can help partners focus on their expectations and the reality of sharing their lives. When confronted with the real potential of friction ahead of time, it can pave the way towards easier acceptance when challenges inevitably arise, and to better navigate a healthy way towards better outcomes.
Personal Growth
Although the focus of couples counseling is of course the couple, it’s not unusual for individuals to also find their own source of growth. Counseling can help you look at your life and your actions in a new way. Many people find troubles in their relationships because they have their own traumas or difficulties they haven’t yet healed. But once you are aware of them, it’s easier to address those issues and find personal growth with the help of your partner and your therapist.
Healthy Communication
Many problems in relationships can be overcome with healthy communication. However, not everyone communicates the same way. At the same time, not everyone has the words or self-awareness necessary to say, “This is what I need from you.” Counseling can help you identify your own communication methods and those of your partner. When we know how we communicate, it’s easier to ask for what we need. When we know how someone else communicates, it’s easier to understand what they are seeking. Miscommunication is often a leading factor in conflicts, and counseling can help you learn how to better communicate as a couple.
Family Merging
In some cases, marriage and dating involves merging two families together. The addition of in-laws and stepchildren can often put a heavy strain on an already-difficult transition period. With varying parenting styles and family relationships in the mix, it’s natural for couples to experience those pressures as they merge their families. Counselors can provide valuable insights and advice on handling the unique challenges mixed families face.
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Personal Solutions
While there are some universal facts (such as healthy communication) that can help all couples, each relationship needs its own solution to problems. Couples counseling doesn’t tell you how to solve your relationship issues, rather it guides you towards solutions that are best for you and your partner. Your counselor will help you facilitate communication and provide insight when needed, not to tell you how to live your life. You and your partner are in control, and it’s ultimately your decision what you do in your relationship.
Finding The Right Couples Counselor
Because every relationship is different, not every counselor will be right for you and your partner. When seeking a couples counselor, be sure to look for the following factors:
Relationship Type
You want to make sure your counselor is both accepting of and experienced in dealing with your particular relationship structure. For example, if you are merging a family, you may want a counselor who has family counseling experience as well.
Couples Counseling At Connected Roots
At Connected Roots, we offer couples counseling for any kind of relationship, and we are here to help guide you to an ideal solution for your relationship. Call us today at 720-593-1062 to learn more about our counseling services.